Human

= Human Type 1: Standard Human = Human is a compact language with a name based off a comment on a Terrible Writing Advice video. It is currently a work in progress.

The name of Human in Human is actually slightly debatable. It's formal name is "Atubav" or "Atubevuf" meaning "The Language Of Ultimatum", but it's informal name is "Heta" meaning "The Language Of Humans".

Grammar
Human follows a free word order, that applies to whether where noun adjective go, too.

Human also handles word types (nouns, adjectives, verbs, and the like) and plurality very interestingly. In Human, any word can be any word type. Fire could be "fire" but could also be "firey" or "burn". It all depends on context.

Plurality works in the way of that there is actually no "s" after nouns to mark their plurality or whatnot, two bird already gets across that there are multiple birds. But if you really need to show that there is multiple, but you don't know the total sum, just say "many X".

Also questions like "aren't you dead?", or "are you not banned from that place?" are considered ungrammatical.

Alphabet and Pronunciation
Human has the exact alphabet of English, but with some added characters, but also minus Q because they came to my birthday party and didn't bring an air-fryer, then said mean things about my mother.

Here are the guides to pronouncing letters which may be hard to guess the pronunciation of:

A = Ah

E = Eh

I = Ih

O = Oh

U = Oo

C = Ch

@ = ɮ (Sounds like the lovechild of Sh and Z)

$ = Sh

X = Ks

Dictionary
Am = Any animal noise

Ib = Me, My

Ka = Animal

$a = Sweet, Cute


 * $el = Silly, Goofy
 * $et = Good

E$ = Kick [off], Throw, Toss, Eject

Eb = Stuff, Object, Thing

Ic = You, Your

Pa = Container

Ez = Sex

El = -Like, Like, Comparison

An = Change, Modify

If = Human, Person, He Who

Se = Control

Eg = Going To, Going, In The Opinion Of

Aj = System

Ep = For, Going To, Going, In The Opinion Of, To

Ca = Eat


 * Cel = Divorce

Lo = Place

Ev = Or

Ex = X, Nothing, Void

Av = Or (for completely opposite options)

On = On, Atop, Alpha

En = In

Ec = World

As = Wide, Large, Size

At = Word, Speak, Speech, Hello, Goodbye, Yes, Okay, Communication


 * Tet = Something That Makes Sense
 * Tetu = Meaning
 * Utet = Nonsense

Po = Do, Work

Va = Create, Make

Et = Broadness Modifier

Nu = 0

Wa = 1

Tu = 2


 * Tule = Half
 * Tulete = Fraction

Pi = 3


 * Pile = Pi
 * Piletu = Infinity, All, Every
 * Gupiletu = Finity

Fo = 4

Ke = 8

Te = 10

Ma = 16

La = 32

Su = 64

Ra = 128

Za = 210

Vu = 256

De = 512

Ku = 1000

Gi = 1024

Zu = 2048

Me = 1000000


 * Mele = 2147483647
 * Meletu = 9223372036854775807
 * Mete = Integer Limits In General
 * Metetu = Big Numbers In General

Ug = Negation Modifier, Makes Numbers Negative Too

Re = Non-Zero Remover (For example: Turns Ku Into 000, Turns Me Into 000000)

Ra = Last Digit Remover (For example: Turns De into 51, Turns Ku into 100)

Ti = Small, Little, Not Much, Functions As A Decimal In Math

I$ = Approximate, Kinda

Pe = Movement

Do = Organ

Ki = What

Bu = Bum, Poop, Fart


 * Gubu = Eat, Food
 * Gubule = Any Form Of Reverse Defecation

Zo = Time, Clock


 * Zole = Space

Si = Eye, See

Mo = Motivated


 * Mole = Inspired
 * Gumole = Uninspired

Gi = Earth, Ground


 * Gile = Planet Earth
 * Ugi = Air

Vi = Fire, Hot


 * Vi$et = A Comforting Sense Of Warmness, Warm
 * Uvi = Water, Cold

Examples
Meow meow meow, I'm a cat. Purr purr purr. kicks stuff off your table. Meow meow meow. tweets inappropriate things on the Internet. Nyaaaa 🥺🥺🥺. starts a political revolution. Meow look how cute I am 🥺. gets arrested for killing capitalism. I'm just a silly cat 🐱

Am am am, ib ka$. Am am am. E$ eb ic p. Am am am. Tawit ezeluc en ecasat. Ammmm. N ifesif. Am ib $. Eg loseja ep cel ezeludaj. Ib aka$ $el.

What is this shit? Every single time I see this uninspired bullshit-ass half-cocked nonsense it's absolutely nothing. There is no joke here. There is no subtext. There is no comedy. This is just a series of vignettes showing things that wouldn't be interesting if they happened to me. I wouldn't find this engaging if I witnessed it occurring from across the room, and yet this aRtiSt has decided it deserved to be committed to MS Paint so that we could all witness their mundane life in perpetuity. I mean, seriously, is this an NFT-type scam or something? Are they using their Patreon to launder money, and driving upvotes here in order to create the illusion that they could realistically be receiving that much? I just cannot fathom that something so "haha relatable" without the "haha" bit could be generating THOUSANDS of positive interactions.

Ki bu? Piletuzo ib is gumole utet-bu tule-  (WIP)

Lessons
Lessons will be on the way once I find this language sufficient.